For a number of years now, I've really struggled with self image and have not really liked being me, I see magazines and know that I don't look like those girls and in the back of my mind I know that they probably don't really look like that either, but it's too late... the spiral has already started. And I know that i'm not the only one that's ever felt like that, like I need to be like everyone else.
A couple of years ago, God really broke into how I was feeling about myself by giving me a picture - I was in a room full of mirrors, like the ones at a fun-house and each one I looked into gave me a distorted image of myself, in one i'd be bigger, in one i'd have shrunk, in one i'd be the size of a house and more, i just kept spinning round and looking at all these mirrors and feeling hopeless, they were everything that I thought about myself in my head, everything that I didn't have the courage to speak out but silently ate away at me. It felt like the mirrors were getting closer and closer to me, they were the only thing that I could see now...but then God broke in and smashed them all. He told me that it doesn't matter what I think the world thinks, all that matters is the truth of what He says about me. Wow - the Truth of what He thinks, that's the only thing that matters... Try reading what he thinks of you here
This is the clearest picture i've ever had and I think it really changed me right there and then, it gave me a hope that there was more than what I was feeling for life, but it's been a journey and i'm only now feeling freedom from what I felt chained to. It's funny but I finally feel unique and i'm alright about that.
but what is unique?
In the dictionary Unique is defined as:
"having no like or equal; unparalleled; incomparable"
So basically something that's unique has nothing else that's like it. It's different, there will never be an exact replica. That's quite a scary thought really, we don't like being different do we?
But the fact is that we ARE all different and we're meant to be that way, even identical twins aren't the same. When we had the 24/7 prayer room at church (which is basically what it says on the tin - a room where people go to pray that is open 24 hours a day) I remember looking at the walls full of written prayers and songs and words and thinking wow, not one bit of writing is the same as another, not one person writes the same - Out of all the people in the world - that's amazing!
I used to compare myself with everyone about absolutely everything - always thinking I was never good enough because I didn't sound like this person or because I didn't think the way that this other person did, but that's exactly the way it should be - God didn't make us all completely different so that we would compare ourselves to each other - He made us completely different so that we don't have to - You're never going to be the same as someone else - no matter how hard you try, but how refreshing is that? How good is it to know that the way you are is exactly the way you're supposed to be - you have talents and gifts that are God given and yeah, so they might not be the same as everybody else, but when we use our different gifts for God it will be harmonious because we'll be using them for the same purpose. Running a restaurant requires all sorts of different people working together for the same purpose, you need waiters, chefs, front of house staff, bar staff, cleaners and if one of those jobs aren't catered for then everything falls through. If everyone wants to be a chef then no one will be served and if everyone wants to be a waiter then no one will get food. It's the same with God, if we all try to be the same person doing the same job then we'll never be any good together.
For those people who think that what they have to say doesn't matter... who else has a voice like you? Can you name someone..? because I know that I can't... It seems like such a little thing sometimes, but think about it... how incredible is it that you are the only person in the world with your voice? Your voice needs to be heard because you're the only person that has it, your voice can make a difference.
So I am unique and you are too, but never think that it's a bad thing because only you can live up to the purpose that is put on your life and that means living of the fullness of your uniqueness and STANDING OUT for God not just FITTING IN.
So try being yourself for a change, you never know - you might enjoy it!